Difficulty is inevitable. Drama is a choice. ~Anita Renfroe
It is impossible to avoid drama in life. We are surrounded by it in movies, sports, in relationships, at work, in the world of politics and in global conflicts. In your personal orbit, you might have a friend or colleague who seems to always be in crisis or who is constantly commanding attention by acting out. Maybe you are entangled in your own dramas that cause you to overreact when something unpredictable occurs.
When big events or lesser everyday stresses, disappointments and frustrations occur, they can reach a critical point and easily boil over into momentary drama.
However, drama addiction can cause you to become stuck in that reactivity and begin to view everything as a crisis, hardship or struggle. Drama Queens (and Kings – this is not gender specific by any means!) are not hard to spot. Here are some dead giveaways that you are in the presence of a drama addict or you are one yourself:
The origins of Drama Queen behaviour usually come from feeling invisible or unloved in childhood. The negative beliefs about not being good enough are soothed by acting out to get attention and feel important. The habit becomes unconscious and continues into adulthood because it delivers a satisfactory amount of regard and creates a sense of connection, importance and feeds the need to matter and belong.
Being the constant complainer, gossip or attention grabber in a group or in a relationship has its downside. It can alienate and isolate you when others reject or judge you for the drama. Your health can suffer from the perpetual stress on your mind and body and it can drain your energy leaving you with no reserves.
You can choose to take the drama out of life. Every difficulty is an opportunity to heal unconscious life patterns. It is possible to change your perspective and your reactions by becoming more aware and mindful in the moments that begin the drama cycle in your life. Here’s how:
Try this Breathing Exercise:
Focus on what you are feeling. Inhale and send your breath to the emotion as you hold the intention to relax the tension.
As you breathe in, invite stillness into your body and mind. As you breathe out, let the high drama release. Keep this cycle going until you notice peace settling within you.
Now become aware of this present moment.
Ask –“Does my reaction match the reality I am facing?” “How can I simply accept things as they are in this moment?”
Say to yourself –“ I am good and I allow myself to focus on my loving heart in this moment. I choose to release my drama and invite loving goodness in.”
Breathe slowly and notice the shifts in your body and your thinking.
Can you commit to giving up drama for one week? Try it and see how it transforms your perspective of self, others and life. You can journal about your experiences and discoveries. Feel free to share them with us. We would love to hear from you.
The drama you are going through is not fueled by the words or deeds of others; it is fueled by your mind that gives it importance. ~ Marc Chernoff